mother of irrational awkwardness

During dinner yesterday, my mother and I were left alone at the table, side by side.
She had never noticed me wearing glasses (I started wearing them about 3-4 months ago) and asked when I bought them.
I said "Dah lama dah."
She asked why didn't I wear the huge ass retro glasses she bought for me, I said they were too common and ugly, mine got stars. (Stars at the edge of my glasses, only meant for stars, like me.)
She stared emotionless and looked away.

After that, I had a major wtf moment when she broke the silence by saying-
"Bapak awak kata awak dah umur 23 dah, dah patut kawin dah pun."
Me: Tapi mak kawin masa umur 28 -___-
Mak: Eh, mak awak belajar pastu kerja tau. Awak tu dah habis belajar, dah kerja dah pun.

I slit my throat.